To the Girl Who is Everyone's "Go-To" Person

To my precious readers, I am sorry but this post is not meant for everyone. This is for the girl who is everyone's "go-to" person. She is a jack-of-all-trades, smart and detailed. She is the girl who all of her friends come to for advice. If you have a problem, she won't sleep until she has a solution. Things that seem complicated to others come easy to her, which is why everyone calls on her for any and everything. She is an amazing listener. When you cry, she can feel your pain. This is the same girl whose mother told her everything and confided in her, even when she shouldn't have because she was too young. When she asks how you are doing, she will actually listen to your response, but unfortunately doesn't always get the same in return. She has been listening to and carrying your baggage for years. 
She seems to have it all together and doesn't ask for much. She would rather take on all of your requests than to disappoint you. People ask her to do tasks beyond her job description, yet she is often overlooked in promotion. This is the girl who has a hard time saying no because sometimes 'no' doesn't seem like a viable option. Some people, even family, see this trait in her and take advantage of that (as if she is your personal money tree or support line). And when she doesn't delivers or decide to say no? She is seen to be selfish and every other time that she has helped in the past seems to fade from their memory. 
Dear Girl Who Is Everyone's "Go-To" Person,

Most people in the world do not have your same heart. A lot of people can only see what benefits them as a person, yet you have been given the beautiful curse to actually give a damn about people other than yourself. You may ask yourself every now and again, "Where is my go-to person? Who looks out for me? If I am always looking out for everyone, don't I deserve someone to do the same for me?" In short, you deserve the world, but in this life, you will not find your reward in other people. Some people are incapable of seeing things outside of their own situation, but you are different. Therefore, your reward comes when you see your life in a different perspective. Yes, people are coming to you for emotional support and it can seem draining. On the other hand, people are coming to you for emotional support because you appear to be emotionally stable. You can take the emotions that they can't stomach themselves. 
So, your family sees you as their personal ATM? Give praise that you are in a financial situation that you can help people if you choose to. Everyone is asking you to do miscellaneous tasks even though you already have a lot on your plate? This could be because others see you as multi-talented (and also that they are too lazy/incompetent to do their own work). This could also show you that you are more talented in another field that you never really considered. Well, its evaluation time at work and you were passed up for that promotion even though your boss comes to you for questions? Maybe this isn't your season to advance yet. Maybe you still have some growing to do or maybe through this position, you will network with someone who will put you in a position better than you could ever dream. 

There is something that you will have to realize: as long as you keep saying yes, you will always be everyone's "go-to" person. In some aspects this can help you in life, but in other's this can make you dread reading your emails and answering your phone. Don't ever lose your heart of gold, but also remind people that they are responsible for their own lives and the decisions that got them to where they are.
In short: don't forget that this is your life, not theirs, and don't let them ever mistake that.

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Quirky, Brown Love is a media outlet for quirky, brown millennials. EST 2014.

Email Bryanda Law, Editor-in-Chief